“Everyone knows eggplant is an erection and people sext with the vegetables, but that does not make it a substitute for language.” Buzzfeed takes you Inside “Emojigeddon”: The Fight Over The Future Of The Unicode Consortium. (I never knew that about eggplant. I’ve always used my Washington Monument emoji.)

+ The Guardian: “A South Sudanese player who starred for his high school basketball team as a 17-year-old student but was later arrested on suspicion that he was, in fact, 29, has insisted he made an honest mistake –- because he didn’t know his real age.” OK, but he was off by twelve years? Even my Tinder profile isn’t that far off…

+ Wired: Dyson’s First-Ever Hair Dryer Will Make All Others Look Weak. (I just aimed a Dyson hair dryer at a Dyson vacuum and created cold fusion in my living room.)