Jensen is Out, Counting Mississippi
Jensen Huang had sex with multiple partners, but somehow my portfolio got screwed. When it comes to Nvidia, I got in early. And I stayed in. I’m not a promiscuous trader who goes in and out, in and out. And until this week, that loyalty had paid off. Like millions of stock owners, I wish I had pulled out earlier. In fairness, nobody thought the AI’s most engorged bubble would ultimately be popped like a cheap condom by the most human of desires. I still have no idea how a guy at the center of the company at the center of the industry at the center of the global economy had the vigor and spare time to juggle numerous affairs (not to mention Donald Trump’s ego). This guy was managing the most important company in the world while managing multiple romantic partners. I’ve seen 100 megawatt data centers that burn less energy. What was he trying to do, run for president? Seriously, if Huang had any more sex out of wedlock, he’d have to rename his company X. Everyone knows the number one rule in business is that you don’t have more partners than your company. I know this seems like a lot of cheap jokes, but after this week’s hit to my portfolio, I can no longer afford the expensive ones. And I’m not the only one. Everyone had Nvidia in their portfolios. And now the thrill is gone. And so is the trill (several of them, actually). I can’t remember if it was Warren Buffett, Milton Friedman, or John Maynard Keynes who said, “Don’t tap that if it will tap the market cap.” Now, Nvidia board members are left to Purell themselves as they feverishly search for a new leader to replace their supposedly irreplaceable old one, who just issued his resignation (although, I’m guessing the board pressed Ctrl-Shift-Esc before Huang pressed Command-Q).
+ Until today, the government was telling us that we can’t drive a Polestar or buy a DJI drone, but it’s fine if Nvidia sells chips to China. And the tech industry that has been telling us that we need to risk our very existence to stay ahead of the Chinese in the AI race initially tried to brush off Huang sharing secrets with a spy as no big deal. Up is down and wrong is right in the age of corruption. Jensen Huang’s resignation means the full story is probably a lot worse than what we already know. It also suggests that there are still lines that can’t be crossed (except when it comes to the administration, whose involvement in this is likely a bigger scandal than the scandal). Now comes the hardest part. Finding a new AI CEO whom people trust when AI CEOs have spent so much time convincing us they’re not to be trusted. Whoever gets the gig is going to have some big shoes — and a lot of little leather jackets — to fill. Trump says that Tim Apple should become Timvidia. But Trump himself is heavily implicated in this disaster. I’d rather see Tim Cook replace him. (If Cook says no to Nvidia, maybe Trump will suggest Dana White for the job.)
+ Meanwhile, the Justice Department has launched several investigations into purported honey-trapping spy Alice Huang. But the people at the very top of the administration were warned about her a long time ago.
+ From washing dishes at Denny’s to rockstar of AI: the rise and fall of Nvidia’s Jensen Huang.
+ The Atlantic (Gift Article): A $5.7 Trillion Face-Plant.
+ Probably desperate to pull the attention back to himself, Elon Musk Says It Would Be an Honor to Hire Nvidia’s Huang. Huang was simultaneously betraying his wife, investors, and American values. Of course Trump and Musk love him.
+ “It has been a hard week, even for the thick-skinned. The news that Jensen Huang, a co-founder of Nvidia, admitted to an affair with a woman whom U.S. intelligence regards as a Chinese spy, has shaken not only Silicon Valley and geopolitics. It also has been an earthquake for the leather-jacket-wearing community.” Jensen Huang Betrayed the Leather Jacket Community. You can run, but you can’t rawhide.
The South Pollster
There was a joke going around the internet that the reason it was taking so long to get the final election numbers from Mississippi is because they have to count, One Mississippi, Two Mississippi, Three Mississippi. Whatever took so long, it was worth the wait. Scott Colom’s “shocking upset victory in a state where Donald Trump won by 23 points in 2024 is even more remarkable considering Mississippi’s history. This was the state where Jim Crow was the most violent and repressive. It was where Emmett Till was lynched, Evers was assassinated, and the young civil rights workers James Chaney, Andrew Goodman, and Michael Schwerner were murdered by the Ku Klux Klan. There were 581 documented lynchings during the Jim Crow era, more than any other state.” Mississippi Elects Its First Black Senator Since Reconstruction. “Before the passage of the Voting Rights Act, only 6.7 percent of eligible Black voters were registered to vote in Mississippi. Now, more than 60 years later, it was Black voters who turned out in record numbers to rewrite the history books, motivated in part by a new struggle to protect voting rights.”
+ “It was Mr. Hudson’s father who was initially cast in the campaign ad mocking a suggestion from Senator Cindy Hyde-Smith, the Republican incumbent, that Mississippi residents pick another type of protein to avoid rising beef prices. When the elder Mr. Hudson balked at a script that would require him to utter profanity on camera, his son volunteered.” The Man at the Center of Scott Colom’s Protein Ad. (And shee-it, that ad helped change history.)
Pro Teen Shakeup
“These settlement numbers, reported for the first time, provide a rare glimpse into what the companies are willing to pay to avoid high-profile trials with teen users — and the looming financial risk such cases present. Roughly 9,800 personal injury cases are pending in state and federal court against Meta, Google’s YouTube, Snap Inc. and TikTok Inc.” Bloomberg (Gift Article): The Confidential Payments Meta and TikTok Made to Addicted Teens. “Seven confidential deals with young plaintiffs ranged from $2 million to $2.5 million. And the remaining personal injury lawsuits could expose the companies to billions of dollars in liability.”
Fly By Night Governance
“Air travel has become so safe in large part because of a profound commitment from the people in charge to learn from tragedies — what aviation experts call ‘lessons written in blood’ … But the Trump administration has displayed an extraordinary unwillingness to learn new lessons, and in some cases it seems to be unlearning the old ones.” James Fallows in the NYT Mag (Gift Article): Is Air Travel Getting Less Safe?
Extra, Extra
Brooklyn Building: “Late Wednesday afternoon, Novella Spence was awakened in her Flatbush Avenue apartment by her child’s cries. ‘Mommy, the building is falling,’ the 51-year-old recalls her daughter saying. ‘I run to the window and look,’ she said, describing the scene across the street. ‘It looks like 9/11. There was mist from the crumble, and the side of the building was gone.'” On the Scene at the Building Collapse on Flatbush Avenue. Here’s the latest from the NYT: 2 Children Among 8 Dead in Brooklyn Building Collapse.
+ Taking a Dip in a Blue Tsunami: “President Trump said on Thursday that he had pulled Vice President JD Vance back from engaging in potential peace talks with Iran, saying that his time would be better spent investigating fraud in Democratic-run jurisdictions.” (Like most Trump decisions, this one is bad in several ways. One of the ways it’s bad is for JD Vance.)
+ Nothing to Write Home About: “The last time sales were this low was August 2010 when the economy was still reeling from the housing bust and the recession that followed.” WSJ (Gift Article): Home Sales in October Plummet to 16-Year Low.
+ On Guard: “Secretary of Defense Pete Hegseth awarded the soldier who reprimanded him and members of his staff at the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier a Joint Service Commendation Medal on Thursday.” (He must have been really embarrassed to award someone he’d ordinarily fire.) After hearing voices and laughter, Specialist Iglesias of The Old Guard yelled, “All visitors will maintain an atmosphere of silence and respect at all times.”
+ Emperor’s Envoy: Ukraine says it’s facing new restrictions to the Starshield network, as Trump envoys meet with Putin. (Let’s hope the new Congress can have these envoys replaced by qualified people who put America’s interests ahead of their own.)
+ South Specific: Senators probing RFK Jr.’s testimony on Samoa trip after AP and Guardian showed documents refute it. You could probably probe almost anything RFK Jr has said and hit investigative pay dirt.
Bottom of the News
“In its glory days, the S.S. United States was fast, luxurious and all but indestructible. As the ocean liner’s designer, William Francis Gibbs, liked to say, ‘You can’t set her on fire, you can’t sink her, and you can’t catch her.’ And he was right, up to a point. On Wednesday one of the greatest ships to sail the seas made its final journey, 180 feet down to the bottom of the ocean.” The S.S. United States, a Historic Supership, Sinks to the Ocean Floor. But the metaphor doesn’t stop there. It was sunk in the Gulf of Mexico…
