“I have discussed, at length, over drinks, whether or not she works out. How many phones she has. If she ever gets sick. If there exists a man who could date her and, more importantly, who we’d want that man to be, because surely we deserve a vote, because stars are just like us, and of all stars, Rihanna feels the most real.” Fader’s Mary H.K. Choi takes a crack at writing a story about Rihanna without Rihanna. (In my mind, I’ve been working on a similar piece about Beyonce for the better part of a decade.)