Book Blurbs

If you really want to hear about it, the first thing you’ll probably want to know is where I was born, and what my lousy childhood was like, and how my parents were occupied and all before they had me, and all that David Copperfield kind of crap, but I don’t feel like going into it, if you want to know the truth. Maybe Holden Caulfield would have admired his modern day adolescent counterparts, because it sure seems like they don’t really want to hear about all that kind of crap, or much else, for that matter. If you must share the details of a protagonist, a brief AI-summarized blurb will do (and please limit summaries to those figures who possess main character energy). For many of today’s teens, reading a novel is a novel activity. It’s easy to blame the trend on social media and other tech distractions, and those are certainly a factor. But, as I’ve noticed in my own kids’ education, teachers also don’t seem to be assigning as many books. Literature is no longer considered lit. I’ve always been a big fan of the impact of first lines of novels, from Toni Morrison’s 124 was spiteful, to García Márquez’s It was inevitable: the scent of bitter almonds always reminded him of the fate of unrequited love, to Snoopy’s It was a dark and stormy night. Sadly, I think Dana Goldstein may have added to this literary canon with the first line in her latest piece for the NYT (Gift Article): “In American high schools, the age of the book may be fading.” Kids Rarely Read Whole Books Anymore. Even in English Class. “Twelfth-grade reading scores are at historic lows, and college professors, even at elite schools, are increasingly reporting difficulties in getting students to engage with lengthy or complex texts.” (Back in our day, when we said, “I’m still working on my novel,” we meant writing one, not trying to read one.)