Waylon Pennings

“Waylon soon grew to be ‘two hundred fifty pounds of pure protein,’ as Austin likes to say—more than an average-sized NFL linebacker. By then, Austin had moved him to a large pen a few hundred yards away from the family home. On particularly beautiful days, he liked to lie on the ground in the enclosure, listening to sports radio and watching the clouds pass by. Inevitably, Waylon would lie down beside him, gingerly resting his enormous, wart-covered head on Austin’s thigh. They could remain that way for five or six hours at a time.” Texas Monthly: His Best Friend Was a 250-Pound Warthog. One Day, It Decided to Kill Him. (I can’t decide whether to go with a sports fan metaphor or a political one, so I’ll just leave this alone.)