“So, how do we make optimal peanut butter and banana sandwiches? It’s really quite simple. You take a picture of your banana and bread, pass the image through a deep learning model to locate said items, do some nonlinear curve fitting to the banana, transform to polar coordinates and ‘slice’ the banana along the fitted curve, turn those slices into elliptical polygons, and feed the polygons and bread “box” into a 2D nesting algorithm.” Optimal Peanut Butter and Banana Sandwiches. (Alternate method: Get a flour tortilla, spread peanut butter on it, throw in a banana uncut, add a few pickles, roll it up, achieve legend status.)

+ “A group of men already on pretrial release for previous offenses are behind a string of burglaries carried out while wearing ankle monitors that track their locations.” I’m not even going to mention which state this happened in.