“The internet should have killed the Butterball Turkey Talk-Line years ago, but all the Google searches, YouTube videos and turkey tweets in the world can’t match the small-bore magic that happens here on the fifth floor of a suburban office building 34 miles southwest of Chicago.” NYT: Turkey Trouble? At Butterball, Operators Are Still Standing By. (I have a recurring nightmare that I call this number and a turkey picks up…)

+ WaPo: How legal weed turned Thanksgiving into a high holiday. (Actually, it was hanging out with your relatives that did that…)

+ Why Do the Lions and Cowboys Always Play on Thanksgiving?

+ And because he needs to ruin everything, Donald Trump Is Now Saying that Democrats Want to Change the Name Thanksgiving. (I don’t care what you call it, as long as it’s fact baste.)