The news singularity occurs when we can no longer decipher real headlines from those in The Onion. Today’s example: Trump’s fake accent angers Asian Americans as they veer left.

+ We all know the ball is juiced like crazy this year. But a bunted home run?

+ Carli Lloyd drilling a 55-yard field goal.

+ Bloomberg: Top Chefs Pick Their Favorite Ice Cream in America. This list includes Mr. Softee dipped in sprinkles. (There’s nothing I like more than frozen chemicals on a hot summer day…)