“The second thing I detect after entering the convention is the sheer amount of milk. Milk in cafeteria-style half-pints, milk in whipped-cream cans aimed directly into mouths, milk splashed forensically near the garbage can, and milk cascading down chins. The room contains a disconcerting volume of milk. Nobody told me this was the milk expo, I wonder, questioning the point of all this dairy, only to answer that question just a little later, in the most self-destructive possible fashion.” Deadspin: Conquering The Carolina Reaper Requires Self-Deceit, Milk, And A Lot Of Barf. (Doesn’t sound all that different from perusing the news…)

+ “My mother was the first person to discover the face of Jesus in a tortilla — whether or not it was a sign from God, it changed our lives.” Christ on the Comal.

+ Washington may become first state to legalize human composting. (Looks like I’m gonna need a bigger green bin.)