Bottom of the News

“If you’re single, you can set up an account stating your preferences and curiosities, as you might with any other service. The app lists 20 possibilities for sexuality alone, including heteroflexible (straight-ish) and homoflexible (gay, for the most part). But couples and partners can sign up, too, in service of finding a third — or a fourth.” A Dating App for Three, Plus.

+ Gizmodo: I Rode an E-Scooter as Far From Civilization as Its Batteries Could Take Me. (Can we get everyone on an e-scooter to do that?)

+ Yesterday in many New England homes: “Honey, the Mueller Report found no collusion and Trump is like super happy.” … Really? Damn. … “Also, it looks like your March Madness bracket is pretty much shot.”… Wait, are you kidding me? … “Oh, Hon, I almost forgot. Gronk retired… Honey? Honey? …”

+ March Madness doubles as vasectomy season. (My bracket is so bad, I never should never have been allowed to reproduce in the first place.)

+ “Hornets’ Jeremy Lamb Stuns Toronto With Absolutely Ridiculous, Game-Winning Buzzer-Beater.

+ That was a lot of news. Relax with some National Puppy Day Photos.

+ In retrospect, it was probably a bad idea to name my beagles Collusion and Obstruction.

+ That was a pretty damn good edition. Please consider forwarding it to a friend and telling them to sign up or get the app at NextDraft.