Strap It On

Destructive weather patterns approach. Democracy teeters. And still, the internet almost never comes quite as alive as it does when there’s an Apple keynote event. (El Chapo wished he had a product this addictive.) And so it was again today as Tim Cook and the gang took to the stage to roll out their new line-up of products. Among them is the latest Apple Watch which “introduces built-in electrocardiogram (ECG) functionality, which uses electrical signals for heart rate monitoring. It’s the first over-the-counter product to offer ECG to consumers … The app can classify signs of atrial fibrillation, which can be followed by a stroke.” With the electrocardiogram feature, Apple is at long last overtly stating a message they’ve been quietly signaling for years: Buy our products or you will die. Seriously, the heart monitoring features on the Apple Watch are a wearable reminder that health in America is for those who can afford it. Here’s more on the new watch and the other products announced in Cupertino. My conundrum is that I want to wear an Apple Watch. I just don’t want to be a guy who wears an Apple Watch.

+ “Products will be introduced: new things with screens, new things that play music, maybe new things that attach to your body. People with nice teeth will come onstage to demonstrate the new wonders of the global age. Except they are not really new wonders, and the aesthetics of the event feel out of sync with the chaotic, uncertain times.” Alexis Madrigal: Everything Is Worse, Except Your Phone. (Interesting stuff. But if nothing else, Apple distracted us from Trump news for a couple hours. And even a hardcore Windows user can be thankful for that…)

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