(If life is a bowl of cherries, what am I doing at the Ritz?) Prince Alwaleed bin Talal (a very active investor in some of your favorite tech companies) sounds almost happy about his imprisonment during Mohammed bin Salman’s round-up of more than 200 Saudi officials. Yes, he was imprisoned at the Ritz, but this sounds like one of those TripAdvisor reviews you assume were written by the hotel manager. “‘I’ve been always all the time here at this hotel and everything’s been fine. I exercise, I stretch, I swim, I walk. I have my diet food … I call my family every day and it’s like my office here. I‘m in touch with my office every day: my private office, my Kingdom [Holding] office, my philanthropic entities. Everything’s functioning. All these rumors really upset me, because they went so far.’ (He later added that his favorite barber had visited him, and that he’d gone vegan, a choice made by only the happiest of people.)”