“As she stood in front of the lights and the camera, a live video selfie projected onto the screen. The video was being fed into a real-time facial recognition software that transformed any unsmiling faces into yellow orbs with two black zeros for eyes and a neutral, flat-line mouth. Anyone wearing a grin or a not-so-happy grimace was instantly transformed into a big green smiley face.” Outside’s Peter Andrey Smith reports on his weekend at a conference for the super-happy. “Americans spend $11 billion a year in pursuit of the blissful happy-ever-after.” (You know what would make them really happy? Saving $11 billion…)

+ Q-Tip related injuries send about 12,500 kids to the emergency room each year. (Further proof, they never listen…)

+ A tweet about chicken nuggets has broken the all-time retweet record.