Have you found yourself lamenting the fact that baby carrots had to be killed just so your kid would consume a small portion of vegetables? Well, relax. Baby carrots are not baby carrots.

+ “When the offers of backstage passes and bikini pics started blowing up his phone, Jonathan Nichols knew something was up.” Verizon gave this guy Sir Mix-A-Lot’s old phone number.

+ Here’s scientific proof that your dog can read your emotions. (This is less compelling than the evidence that your cat doesn’t give a shit.)