Bottom of the News

Could one single headline ever sum up the entirety of an era of America life? I’m not sure. But this one sure comes damn close: Man Arrested in Mall Food Court for Stealing Sex Toys Had Just Gotten Engaged at Walmart.

+ Feeling claustrophobic? Maybe it’s because half of the world lives on 1% of its land.

+ We are apparently living in the golden age of the goatee (even though we can’t quite agree about what constitutes a goatee).

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