“Jared Lorenzen and I are in love with the same woman. Her name is Little Debbie, and she makes delicious snack cakes.” ESPN’s Tommy Tomlinson on the NFL QB who shares a problem with millions of Americans. But in his case, his fat went viral.

+ Did the brutal dictator of Zimbabwe raise money from a Wall Street hedge fund to crush his opposition? From BloombergBusinessweek: The Hedge Fund and the Despot.

+ “Hi, if you are reading this then they killed me. I wanted to tell you that I enjoyed talking to you, you seem like a really great lady. I’m sorry we didn’t meet under different circumstances.” Michelle Lyons witnessed more than 278 executions. As Texas Monthly reports, that took a toll: The Witness.

+ And if you missed it earlier in the week, there’s been a lot of buzz about Michael Finkel’s piece in GQ: The Strange and Curious Tale of the Last True Hermit.