Since we are encountering the inauspicious combination of a full moon and a Friday the 13th, it seems fitting that we lead today’s edition with Mat Honan’s ominous look at the house of the future in Wired’s: The Nightmare on Connected Home Street. “I know this sounds weird, but I actually brew coffee with a real kettle. The automatic coffee machine is offline. I had to pull its plug because it was DDOSing a gaming server in Singapore.” Comedian Steven Wright foreshadowed the connected home more than a decade ago with this joke: “In my house there’s this light switch that doesn’t do anything. Every so often I would flick it on and off just to check. Yesterday, I got a call from a woman in Germany. She said, ‘Cut it out.'”

+ Comcast is planning to turn the router in your house into a publicly available hotspot. (And although they can’t yet tell you why, you can get a monthly discount on your broadband bill if you wrap your largest child in foil.)

+ “On a bright April morning in Menlo Park, California, I became an Internet spy.” Ars Technica tests Internet surveillance by spying on an NPR reporter.

+ Sidenote: This particular Friday the 13th should only be of real concern to those who suffer from both paraskevidekatriaphobia and selenophobia.